when i get anxious, i go straight for signs of weakness. whether that's the clogged pores on my arms or juan's, or sometimes his habits, i can be merciless, obsessive in pursuit of "fixing" something. oh, i'm definitely not proud, but i am human.
i have eczema, allergies, frequent dermatitis, and pretty much any other common dry skin issue that's exacerbated by feeling anxious about it, or about other things. so i have a lot of imperfect skin to choose from. when i say this, i know that no one's skin is perfect, but that is how i'll see anything once that adrenaline starts pumping and logic is swinging itself out of the window and into the nearest tree.
this week i stopped peeling my nails, squeezing blackheads, scratching eczema patches, and generally attacking juan's skin as well. it has not been super easy. i come from a family of nit-pickers; it's a learned habit, but also one brought out by whatever negative emotions i'm cycling through.
all in all, my skin has improved by leaps and bounds over the course of these seven days. i am really focused on being more disciplined with this kind of stuff in the future, but the week's been a good place to start.
this week: learn (and re-learn) some music theory. embrace the music nerd. circle those fifths and modulate them scales.
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